Modern Hygiene

written by Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis

Modern Hygiene

— Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis

'Mother, may I go in to swim?'
'My dear, you didn't oughter.
I've heard of baths filled to the brim
With something more than water.'

'Mother, I want to learn to swim.'
'Oh, have a care, my daughter!
I fear this ultra-modern whim
To lave in ale and porter.'

'Mother! They all go in to swim!'
'Think of the aftermath, dear.
Well, hang your clothes on a hickory limb,
But never drink your bath, dear.'

About the poet


Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis

Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis, better known as C. J. Dennis, was an Australian poet known for his humorous poems, especially "The Songs of a Sentimental Bloke", published in the early 20th century. Though Dennis's work is less well known today, his 1916 publication of The Sentimental Bloke sold 65,000 copies in its first year, and by 1917 he was the most prosperous poet in Australian history. Together with Banjo Paterson and Henry Lawson, both of whom he collaborated with, he is often considered among Australia's three most famous poets. When he died at the age of 61, the Prime Minister of Australia Joseph Lyons suggested he was destined to be remembered as the "Australian Robert Burns". Biography C. J. Dennis was born in...

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